Seven Canadians Who Want to Overthrow the Trudeau Regime

By Woke Up! Staff

The race for the leadership of the federal Conservative Party of Canada is heating up with new names coming forward daily to contest early favourites Jordan Peterson and Pierre Poilievre. The new leader is to be chosen by party members on September 10. So who’s got the most PROS to lead the CONS to victory? Get Woke Up! with our handy leadership lowdown.

Jordan Peterson: You don’t have to have been living under a truck for the last three weeks to know that Dr. Jordan Peterson has been tearing Prime Minister Justin Trudeau a new one on Twitter, YouTube and in your local record store. Peterson is no stranger to controversy and standing his ideological ground. First known for his dissenting views on gender and left-wing politics, the gasbag of oil country recently took a jab at the pandemic response debate that has seen Canada thrown into a virtual civil war of freedom lovers vs. lockdown bootlickers.

PROS: Peterson tells it like it is. People are tired of the same old ivory tower, philosopher types. They need a real person, someone who speaks the language of the everyman. Honk Honk!

CONS: He’s the darling of the Right who is actually more of a centrist (but don’t tell his basement dwelling podcast fanboys).

Pierre Poilievre: This young, energetic and inspirational MP is viewed by many as the heir apparent to the Conservative Party Leadership due to his firm and intelligent criticism of the Liberal government and open endorsement of the Freedom Rally Convoy. Poilievre often outshone outgoing leader Erin O’Toole and stutter-prone PM Justin Trudeau with his intelligent, witty and well-researched performances both in and out of parliament. 

PROS: Pro freedom, anti mandate and his wife is cute.

CONS:
Critics say that as a right of centre candidate there will be little room for the party to grow in a general election where the majority of Canadians tend to vote down the middle for moderates like Trudeau, and still end up with extremists like Trudeau. 

Jean Charest: The former Quebec Premier and Conservative to Liberal party flip flopper is touted by the old guard of the party as a safe, centrist choice that won’t make any waves. Hey, it worked with Erin O’Toole, right? Uh, hello … 1995 Quebec called, it wants Captain Canada back … and Boyz II Men. Man, those harmonies!

PROS: Thanks to his extensive work as a lobbyist for Meng Wanzhou, of Huawei, maybe he can finally get Canadians lower rates for our cell phones.

CONS: The Chinese Communist Government will be listening in to Canadians cell phones.

Dr. Leslyn Lewis: While an intelligent breath of fresh air and strong contender in the most recent leadership debate she is sure to fail because if there’s anything Conservatives can’t stand it’s change and the possibility to actually win at anything.

PROS: A strong female person of colour bucking the olde boys network.

CONS: A strong female person of colour bucking the olde boys network.

Peter MacKay: Yawn. Former leader of the old federal PC party and runner up in the last Conservative Leadership bid. Lawyer, yawn. Lobbyist, yawn and former cabinet ministerrrrrrrskdjlsdkfajs;dkfj ….. sorry we fell asleep while writing about Peter MacKay. 

PROS: We’ve never had a real life like wax work for a Prime Minister before.

CONS: The country’s helicopter travel budget will be sky high!

Roman Baber: This maverick Ontario MP was turfed from his provincial Conservative Party for speaking out against lockdowns and other unscientific pandemic response measures the government undertook in its assault on personal freedoms. One of the few MPs with the guts and integrity to hold truth to power and go against his own party could this fresh, bright young 42-year-old son of freedom loving Soviet Union defectors be the leader the party needs? 

PROS: Babs has been at the front of the battle lines in the war on freedom in Onterrible for the past 2 years of flattening the curb or spread or whatever. He has displayed personal integrity, sound reasoned criticisms and rational solutions to dealing with COVID-19.

CONS: It’s easy to read Roman Barber when you see Roman Baber. This could be confusing for Conservative voters. (We’ll give you a few more minutes with that one.)

Elon Musk: Bitcoin booster, electrically magnetic, self-made billionaire and Twitter trouble maker, Musk could just be the reboot needed for the faulty Conservative Party. Could this modern day renaissance man be the hero needed to slay the Liberals? The only hiccup, say political observers, would be his dual American and South African citizenships. Oh, and he’s an alien whose only true goal is to create a spacecraft with the ability to return him to Mars.

PROS: On Halloween children could dress up as the Prime Minister with their Elon Masks. 

CONS: That’s the best pun we could come up with for his weird name. 

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One Comment

  1. NONE of the above, especially Pierre Poilievre, he is listed with the WEF, World Economic Forum, he is not ever to be trusted. He is a traitor, a “wolf” in Sheep’s clothing…….

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