Let me start off by saying that even though I haven’t actually seen “Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse” yet, the online discourse surrounding the film and the blatant iconography and symbolism bathing the character of Gwen Stacy has me vehemently agreeing with what a lot of folx are saying: Spider-Gwen is canonically trans. She is ours now. Deal with it, bigots. You can’t gatekeep fictional characters.
Whilst man babies and nerds on the far-right are creating unnecessary amounts of drama over this (just let us have this one thing!!), those of us not deeply immersed in comic book cults, Qanon echo chambers and toxic fandoms have been getting on with our lives. However, seeing as I don’t have one I decided to educate and enrich everyone with a top ten list of fictional characters you never knew were transgender slay queens!
The task proved surprisingly easy. Trans symbolism is everywhere when you look for it! So many characters are subtly queer coded or outright flaming LGBTQIAP+ members underneath their heteronormative facades. Quite frankly, after my deep dive I’m struggling to think of ANY canonically straight characters in fiction! Y’all were played by Hollywood, cissies.
Without further ado, let’s get to the list. Trigger warning for folx: where applicable deadnames WILL be included!
10. Dr. Eggman (Deadname: Ivo Robotnik)
C’mon, it’s obvious, it’s even in the name! Dr. EGGman. Softly chant it with me now: egg, egg, egg.
This beautiful blimp of a bean is one Reddit post away from embracing his true nature. The iconic “villain” is well known for performing transformative experiments on Flickies and other young wildlife in the Sonic universe. Remind you of anything? I propose that Dr. Eggman is woefully misunderstood – perhaps those creatures consented to be roboticized – and that Sonic is an ignorant, transphobic bigot on par with Matt Walsh. After all, Eggman is a man of science. How dare the bigoted blue blur argue against science?
Dr. Eggman would be best off taking a page from Dr. Hotez’ book and not debating with Sonic or RFK Jr. on the ethics and merits of mRNA robotization.
9. Chandler Bing
“Friends” is literally the most offensive show ever, but the one saving grace is that the creators included a deeply woven and incredibly subtle storyline wherein Chandler Bing, one of the show’s main characters, gradually reveals himself to the audience to be a woman trapped in a man’s body.
It might sound like I’m going down the rabbit hole here, but stay with three more white people claps. The evidence? As the series progresses, Chandler acts increasingly feminine (mischaracterized as “Flanderization”), lets go of his internalized bigotry and hatred for his cross-dressing father and by extension himself, and do I even need to go into the obvious symbolism with him having his third nipple removed? Could they BE any more trans?
8. Dr. Lawrence Kutner (Deadname: Lawrence Choudhary)
Bit of a deep cut with this one, folx. Those of us who watched “House M.D.” will remember Kutner as one of the titular character’s new team members, debuting in Season 4. Played to queer perfection by former Harold and Kumar actor and future Michael Obama staffer Kal Penn, Kutner’s storyline abruptly ends when he suddenly commits suicide.
Uncharacteristically, House is stumped, unable to figure out why Kutner killed himself, and being a massive bigot never questions whether xey were trans. It literally would have been my first guess! Do better, House!
7. Paulie Pennino
The true protagonist of the Rocky franchise, Paulie was always trans and we love him for it. Stallone won’t admit this due to the inevitable backlash from his far-right fanbase, but Paulie was born with no genitals and is a non-binary trans-masc egg.
I can already hear the bigots crying out in befuddlement and white-hot rage at me for even suggesting this. Let’s look at the facts blow by blow: Paulie is given a sex robot for his birthday in Rocky 4, providing him with the acceptance and companionship he could never find in another human being besides Rocky and Adrian, and later in the same film he laments to Rocky about his all too relatable situation, expressing his wish to “unzip” himself and “step out and be someone else”. KO, okay.
6. Every John Wayne Character Ever
Two reasons: John Wayne was a right-wing asshole, and his fans admire his toxic masculinity. Well, we own him now, chuds. He was just posturing; all that bravado and bluster was a front for being trans.
Even his problematic portrayal of Genghis Khan was laced with trans symbolism (namely exposing himself to dangerous and ultimately fatal elements that had no long term data).
Suck on that, pilgrim.
5. Maggie Simpson
Say it with me now: trans babies exist. Maggie Simpson is a testament to that scientific fact. At a measly 34 seasons, Maggie’s trans journey is well documented by now. Her rivalry with Gerald, the cis male baby with the monobrow, is emblematic of her anger and frustration at being born in the wrong body. Her clobbering Homer with that hammer and shooting Mr. Burns were cries for help from a troubled, trans soul, much like the Nashville school shooter; once again The Simpsons foreshadowed the future.
(For reasons of taste a section of this article was edited, removing a questionable explanation as to what Maggie’s pacifier represents—ed).
4. Dr. Niles Crane
The real reason we never saw Maris on-screen in “Frasier” is because Niles was Maris! It’s sit-com genius! Niles was assigned female at birth, and went by the name Maris until after years of being a psychiatrist he came to a breakthrough and discovered his true self. Frasier, being a fellow psychiatrist, was more than supportive, and even though Martin was a boomer gammon, he loved his child enough to let go of his bigotry. It’s inspiring. This also helps explain why several times throughout the series Frasier and Martin show deep concern whenever Niles ponders going back to Maris (i.e. detransition).
Also, Daphne was a man, obviously.
3. John Bender
Like so many closeted trans folx, Bender lashes out at authority and finds it hard to fit in with his peers. This informs the bulk of his behavior throughout “The Breakfast Club.” As a smokescreen for his blatant transness, he overcompensates, makes bigoted remarks, and even goes so far as to sexually harass Claire by shoving his head between her legs – though read another way this could just be a misguided way of getting a look at what he desires most for himself!
Bender’s trans arc is completed when at the end of the film he wears one of Clarie’s earrings and triumphantly punches the air, signifying that he is ready to embrace being a woman.
2. Helena Shaw
Phoebe Waller-Bridge is almost certainly going to steal every scene in the new Indiana Jones movie. Her character of Helena Shaw is poised to take over the whip should the 80-year-old Harrison Ford decide he’s had enough of the role and try his hand at politics, perhaps even throwing his own hat into the ring for POTUS! So how amazing would it be if the new Indiana Jones was not only a progressive third wave feminist played by an absolutely smashing actress (SHE’S GORGEOUS), but if xey were also trans?
Imagine the possibilities, the representation, the absolute hype! Once I’m able to buy a ticket (literally every showing in my local cinemas are booked!), fight through the crowds and see the damn film I’ll let y’all know if our hopes and dreams have been fulfilled!
1. Gollum (Deadname: Smeagol)
Debuting in Tolkein’s far inferior sequels to Amazon’s amazing and groundbreaking “Rings Of Power”, Gollum is transformed by the One Ring (a stand in for puberty blockers, top and bottom surgery, child friendly tuck suits at Target; y’know, basic human rights) and is living his best and most beautiful life until Bilbo comes along and steals it off him.
Over the course of the books and Jackson’s films, Gollum is constantly dead named by Frodo and pressured to detransition. I don’t think I’ve ever identified with a fictional character more. Seeing Gollum clutch his precious and experience such joy as he plummets towards his fateful demise is so bittersweet. Elliot Page– I mean, Andy Serkis gave a wonderful performance.
