As an avid watcher and massive fan of SNL’s hilarious satire output in recent years, I was heartbroken and severely triggered when I tuned in to see controversial BIPOC “comedian” and transphobe Dave Chappelle hosting. I screamed at Alexa through the thick layer of N95 masks strapped around my mouth to mute the offending media, but my muffled cries went unanswered. I sat there horror-struck as my chud brother Kyle guffawed (unmasked) over Chappelle’s deeply unhinged, anti-Semitic rant. I couldn’t believe my ears when Chappelle subtly alleged very directly that The Holocaust never happened.
When the 93 minutes of hate were over, Kyle immediately rushed to his room to spread vile misinformation on 4chan about how the MSN (which is just an alt-right code for “the Jews”) will spin Chappelle’s ‘daring monologue’ whilst blasting Kanye West’s “POWER” (a white supremacist anthem and call-to-arms) at full volume.
Hatred Amplified
I stood staring at the blank TV set, wet crocodile like tears rolling down my masked cheeks, knowing in my boosted heart that I had just witnessed the flashpoint of a violent, anti-Semitic insurrection which would claim the lives of countless bankers and Hollywood executives. It was going to be Holocaust 2.0, the sequel no one asked for. If only Spielberg could have been directing.
Over the next few days I contacted all my Jewish friends to see how they were coping, and to make sure they were still alive. I almost had a heart attack (second one this month) when my friend Shlomo told me that he was about to board a train but calmed right down when he clarified that he was heading into town for his latest booster jab. Phew!
Shortly after visiting Shlomo in the hospital (mild stroke, total nothing-burger) I read an article online from The Atlantic, a lovely, unbiased and totally impartial piece by Yair Rosenberg gently wagging his finger at Chappelle for his delusional anti-Semitism and for not being funny. I wholeheartedly agree. There is NOTHING funny about Jewish folx, and Chappelle’s blatant attempts to rile the audience into a KKK-style lynch mob deserve to be taken deadly seriously by not only the Hollywood elite, but the global Jewish community.
Take my white guilt, Please!
Perhaps the most offensive part about Chappelle’s rant is that it’s old schtick and extremely unfunny. Maybe the audience would have been more receptive to harmless jokes about gassing the unvaccinated and forcing them into quarantine camps, instead of regurgitating dangerous rhetoric in a desperate and foolish attempt to repeat history. I’d say Chappelle needs to ‘Do Better’ but quite frankly I think it’s high time we arrest and cancel him and his loony fans for their inhumanity, transphobia, and for threatening Our Democracy.
The same can be said for Kanye West, Kyrie Irving and even Tucker Carlson. Harsh reparations need to be made to the Jewish community, and I’m not just saying this because I’m half-Jewish and would benefit financially from it. Their relentless pursuit of extorting and vilifying Jewish folx must come to an end. They are evil and I want their money NOW. How else can I finally finish off what my Mohel started by fully transitioning into the beautiful womxn I know I am deep inside.
It’s hard to believe that in 2022 we are seeing the rise of Nazi Germany in America and the rest of the Western, “civilized” world. So, until those racist, authoritarian chuds are thrown in jail or executed and we can finally rest, I will be keeping a diary of my thoughts and feelings. Such a secret diary may be of use in the event that I am forced to hide out from the state and socially distance in an attic alongside my unvaxxed chud brother and boomer gammon parents. Future generations will look back on my child-like, insightful words and know what it was like to be a heckin’ transgender, half-Jewish millennial LIVE! FROM MAGA COUNTRY ON SATURDAY NIGHT!
