When commander-in-beef Donald Trump recently took up the job of a McDonald’s employee, MAGA voters were mouthing: “I’m lovin’ it!”
But while DJ Big Mac of the People isn’t afraid to share his fries with the common folk, Kamala “Hamburglar” Harris grimaces at the thought of grilling for change.
Trump was quick to quip, while slinging hash browns for the masses, he “worked at McDonalds for 15 minutes longer than Kamala did,” mocking Harris’ fake job credentials (among them, being Vice-President—ed).
Can GWU! tell apart the special sauce that it takes to be a McDonald’s employee vs. political clown like Kamala Harris?
1. Would You Like Communism with That?
Makes jarring inhuman and indecipherable sounds when confronted with simple questions such as “How much will this cost?”
2. We Love to See You Smile
Constantly trying to spread joy with free, fake smiles for zombie voters (as well as free bus rides to swing states for seconds on buffet ballot stuffing).
3. Bidenomic Value Menu
Incapable of reading you something as simple as a menu without the aid of a script. (Would you like to supersize your abortion, sir?)
4. It’s Big Mike … err Mac Tonight!
At the end of the day answers to a creepy clown.
5. BLM Playland
Wears regulation Black uniform, unless it’s time to mmmumble some patois on St. Patrick’s Day when the lunch menu switches over to spiked Shamrock Shakes.
6. Quarter Pounder Walz Cheese
Attempts to upsell your kids unhealthy life options, like chopping off their breasts and weiners.
7. Over 337 Million (to be) Scammed
Uses easy to remember slogans and mass marketing to sell you crap.
8. Did Somebody Say Genocide?
Gives Israel a free lunch.
9. Golden State Showers
Gave away Happy Meals in California and happy endings in San Francisco.
10. All the Happy Meals a Stage
Works with a weird cast of fictional characters to push poor life choices.
11. You Deserve a Break Today
They stand zero chance of winning the election. Which makes sense as voters say their number one menu item in 2024 is to Make America Great Again.
If you answered McDonald’s employee to any of these question then you need to stop watching MSNBC and start subscribing to theGWU.net.
