2024 Election

BREAKING – Christine Elliott Quits as Minister of Health and Deputy Premier

Christine Elliott is stepping down as Minister of Health. Elliott has been in politics for 13 years - the length of time agreed upon in her contract with Satan.

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Christine Elliott is stepping down as Ontario’s deputy premier & Minister of Health. Elliott has been in politics for 13 years, which is the length of time agreed upon in her contract with Satan. Elliott says her departure has nothing to do her governments mishandling of the Covid-19 pandemic, rather she just wants to spend more time with her plastic surgeon and two faces.

Critics of the hapless Health Minister tell Woke Up! a different story. With the leaked Pfizer documents outlining serious known and hidden adverse reactions now public could Elliott be the proverbial rat jumping the sinking ship of Doug Ford’s fally ?

“It could be the Pfizer thing, or the lawsuits,” says our political critic. “But it’s probably the removal of the mask mandate. I mean, if I had a face like that, I wouldn’t want to show it either.”

“One thing is for certain,” he concludes. “The mask is off with this scamdemic, Christine Elliott is just as ugly on the inside as she is on the outside.”

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Coming up next time on Woke Up ! podcast with Mad Dug and Anthony

Mad Dug) Why is Christine Elliott making that face?
Anthony) That’s the expression the person who the face belonged to before they were murdered.
Mad Dug) Uh?
Anthony) And had their face carved off.
Mad Dug) No, really?
Anthony) Yeah, really.
Mad Dug) You’re wrong Anthony. It’s the face a real estate lawyer, lost in the forest, makes … when she smells the approaching packs of lawsuits.

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