With super woke Jon Stewart’s return to “The Daily Show” as a once-a-week host, critics and viewers are wondering if he’s going to turn his previous comedy gold into diamonds or coal.
While Jon tried to make a career outside of the late-night Comedy Central staple as a serious documentary producer and more recently as an ‘investigative comic journalist’ on AppleTV, GWU! predicts his new ‘A’ material will fail. As Jon has aged, so has his audience. Will outdated wokifiedTM material turn the former King of Late Night into a Slave of Reruns?
Here are GWU!’s Top 10 signs that Jon Stewart is past his Prime Time.
10. His new guests will include Obama, Obama, and Obama. (And maybe even Michelle once.)
9. Jon will announce 15 times per show that men can get pregnant while wearing a dress (but in a celebratory, non-transphobic, non-funny way).
8. There will be Jewish jokes … but any Republican who laughs at them will be canceled for being anti-semitic.
7. In order to strengthen democracy and be a bulwark against fascism Stewart will have a recurring segment: Biden Is Not Senile, You Are Just a Nazi.
6. Stephen Colbert will ‘hilariously’ pop out from under Jon’s desk and vaccinate the entire studio audience.
5. Doing his best ‘Grouchy old uncle who’s been to sensitivity training / struggle sessions’ routine, Stewart will: TELL IT LIKE IT IS! and STICK IT TO THE MAN! Then the self-identifying 61-year-old, worth 100 million dollars, will be chauffeured back to his totally authentic rich guy ‘farm’ to recuperate for 6 days before his next show.
4. The entire cast of roving comedy correspondents including Desi Lydic, Dulce Sloan, Michael Kosta, Ronny Chieng, Jordan Klepper and Lewis Black will be replaced with trans children, reporting live from Gaza, dressed as weather girls from the 80s.
3. Jon will spend 25% of the show explaining long covid and his own personal battle with TDS.
2. Right after every commercial break Stewart will perform a land acknowledgment renouncing his white privilege and then remind viewers he’s not Tucker Carlson. This can be confirmed by comparing their ratings.
And the number one sign that Jon Stwart is past his Prime Time …
1. He’ll start every show off with a Top Ten List.
Hilarious!