Remember the good old days when believing in alien life and UFOs painted you as an X-Files obsessed weirdo? You know, the kind of wide-eyed nutbar who would call into Art Bell’s Coast-to-Coast radio show at 3am and ramble on about Area 51 and Men In Black.
Well, in current day Clown World where men are women, freedom is racist and 2+2=5, if you DON’T believe we’re currently being invaded by Little Green Men in flying saucers— you’re the tinfoil hatted conspiracy theorist! What a time to be alive!
Maybe, you think to yourself, an alien invasion would be preferable to what our parasitic “Elites” are currently inflicting upon us. Maybe it would be a breath of fresh air to get beamed aboard a Mothership (sorry – Birthingpersonship) and have your anal cavity probed. Some time off-planet might actually be very much appreciated after the past three years.
But let’s face it, these Martian spy balloons are likely just a cover up for all of the fuck ups, psy-ops and naughty client lists that threaten to expose and weaken the currentthing industrial complex.
So, anti-conspiracy theory theorists, take off your tin foil hats, open your mind and swallow the red pill as GWU! uncovers the real reasons for all those Unidentified Aerial Phenomena (UAP) in the skies.
7. Covid Mutant Pfizer Virus
Strange coincidence that these UFOs ‘appeared suddenly’ right after the bombshell videos released by Project Veritas exposing Pfizer went viral. Pfizer employee Jordon Trishton Walker (RIP, bro) was filmed saying some very damaging things about his company, including that they were trying to mutate the Covid virus so they could preemptively develop a vaccine for it. Since the videos were released, Veritas frontman and forever toxic avenger James O’Keefe was fired from the very company he founded.
Presumably, the board members behind his character assassination had a ‘call’ or hefty paycheck from their bosses at Pfizer. It’s not hard to believe that Pfizer would put out a hoax to distract the public from their massive scandal. Come on, it’s for their safety!
6. Made in China Invasion
Not long after the US shot down the Chinese spy balloon did reports about other UFOs start hitting the mainstream media. Given that the Biden administration has been so trigger-happy when dealing with these aircraft, it makes us wonder if these are just other spy balloons sent by China. Or perhaps they’re kamikaze pilots that have been sent to attack the US in retaliation for their balloon being popped?
After all, despite US airspace allegedly being blanketed by thousands of spy balloons during Trump’s administration he never once shot a single one down! It’s like The Donald says: “No matter how many Chinese spy balloons you shoot down, you’re always hungry for more in an hour.”
5. The Epstein Client List
There are a lot of similarities one could draw between aliens and Epstein’s island hopping pals. They both abduct people, probe them against their will, and then ditch them in the middle of nowhere with a story that no one will believe.
That darn client list is a scaly thorn in the side of our rapey reptilian overlords, and they will do ANYTHING to keep it from being exposed. Perhaps this is just the most recent of their desperate psy-ops to confuse and distract those calling for the list to be released to the public. #theballoondidntkillitself
4. “Greetings Earthling, shall we discuss climate change?”
Wouldn’t it be amazing if the benevolent, all-knowing CGI aliens landed and lectured us all about the dangers of; climate change, COVID and owning things?
They could make a TikTok about how a One World Government headed by Klaus Schwab would be beneficial to the survival of our planet and species. That would be something for your page, eh? They could even add cute little animations of those little WEF badges digitally pinned to their spacesuits.
3. The Ohio Chemical Spill and Daily Train Derailments
The mainstream media seem to have a chemical sensitivity to this story, as do climate activists. That means it’s full steam ahead for Greta Thunberg grifting her new book about climate change, cutting down many, many trees in the process when the whole thing could have been published on a Kindle or straight to her computer’s trash bin.
Meanwhile, the mainstream media points at flying saucers while the people in East Palestine, Ohio are breathing in toxic fumes and drinking contaminated water, something the senile President doesn’t give a single scoop of ice cream about. GWU! theorizes these chemical spills, either accidental or orchestrated, are being ignored for some reason, and the UAPs are providing a nice little distraction from Biden’s monumental ball’s up.
2. Balloon Boy Rides Again!
The infamous Heene family from the 2009 balloon boy hoax are the ones releasing the UFOs as they float their last hope for media attention. Working with the History Channel’s own Giorgio Tsoukalos the balloon boy himself, Falcon, is behind it all and masterminded the entire plot. His fifteen minutes of fame weren’t enough, and now he’s back to claim the limelight once more!
It’s only a matter of time before his nefarious scheme is uncovered, only this time it’ll be his parents accidentally exposing him on live television. Is such a thing even possible? Yes, yes it is!
1.The Aliens ARE Already HERE!
That’s right, the craziest explanation is the most obvious one. The aliens ARE in fact real. The media knows that no one believes them anymore after gaslighting and lying about the pandemic, climate change, the Nord Stream Pipeline and every other event for the past three years but they’re telling the truth for once to cover for all their lies! If this is the case, GWU! can’t wait for our new alien friends to meet with our “leaders.”
Then and only then will our intergalactic visitors share the universal truth that the problem isn’t conspiracy theories but the people conspiring against us that make us have to theorize.
