Captain Bill Agnew loves masked comicbook characters, but this summer the British naval hero found himself fighting back against the villains of Strange Adventures—a Halifax comicbook shop in Nova Scotia, Canada—after an employee attempted to force Agnew and his family into wearing masks, despite Public Health removing provincial mask mandates more than 100 days ago.

An avid comicbook and toy collector, Agnew had heard great things about the store Strange Adventures and was looking forward to visiting the east coast’s biggest comicbook and collectables store in person. Agnew, a highly decorated retired Royal Navy Captain from the UK, was on vacation with his wife and three children this August for the first time since the global health pandemic shuddered travel and tourism more than two years ago. 

“My kids and I were fixing to spend about 400 £ ($625 cdn) on some hard to find items I knew they had in stock.”

However, when Agnew along with his wife and children arrived at the Halifax nerd mecca, they noticed something odd about Strange Adventures. “Through the window I could see there were only a handful of anemic looking young men in masks shopping. Which I thought was odd for such a nice looking shop on a busy tourist street on a really lovely summer day,” adds Vicki, Bill’s wife. 

“Then, as I grabbed the shop door handle I noticed one of many faded notes taped to the glass door that read ‘Knock to come in and we will unlock the door. Masks must be worn. Limit your time to 10 minutes.’”

Vicki also noticed a fading sandwich board outside that had a flimsy piece of paper attached with the hashtag #wearamask scribbled.

“We dropped masking half a year ago in England,” Bill says, still confused by the ordeal. “I never agreed with forcing people but I still complied when it was the law … even though I can’t breathe through them and masks don’t stop viruses.”

A STRANGE ADVENTURE

Captain Agnew adds that he checked both the Stranger Adventure website and the Nova Scotia government’s to see if there was still a masking policy. “I was under the impression that the store didn’t require them as the mandate had been dropped.” 

But when the peaceful family tried to enter the store “maskless” they were bombarded by an overweight beast of a man who began bellowing at sweet Vicki that she couldn’t enter without a mask. Taken aback at this August 2020 behavior in August 2022, she attempted polite British diplomacy. 

“Sorry, we didn’t know,” the mother of three smiled, “but we came all the way from the UK to see your store. Do you have disposable masks we can wear?”

To which the employee sighed audibly through his mask and snapped, “No, but you can buy some cotton ones up the road.”

Growing stormy at the mannerless treatment of his wife, Captain Agnew dropped anchor and weighed in. “Hang on. You want us to walk up the road to buy masks, just to come in for 10 minutes. Forget it! You just lost our money!! You’re crazy!!! 

“At least I’m alive” snarled the man, as he slammed the door shut in the family’s faces. 

According to the CDC, however, COVID-19 is much more serious with those over the age of 80 or with a BMI of 30 and above, which physically fit and feisty Agnew is pretty sure the shop owner was. Still, pontificates the sardonic seaman, the ‘Joker’ in the store should be taking better care of himself instead of relying on customers to save his “overweight arse.”

The province of Nova Scotia was one of the last provinces in pandemic-obsessed Canada to drop mask mandates in stores in March but some shops such as this one in Halifax are still not following the science. 

GO WOKE, GET BROKE

Owner of Strange Adventures Cal Johnston recently told east coast business publication Huddle that he is frustrated he’s been left in a position where doing what he feels is the right thing could affect his bottom line, adding that at least when government restrictions were in place, it gave businesses like his some cover. The publication goes on to quote him: “It was very nice for the small businessman to be able to shrug and say ‘hey, man, friggin’ government.” 

Agnew says that his experience is a clear example of a shop owner not understanding his business or his customers. “I was fuming. I shouldn’t have called the bloke at the door crazy but … I mean, the tosser clearly was.”

TO BE CONTINUED…

A short walk later the family was cheerfully welcomed into rival shop Monster Comic Lounge with no bossy obese employees or medical orders reduced to hashtags.

“The staff were all masked, which is fine by me, we’re at the personal choice stage of the pandemic,” chuckles Agnew. “They weren’t forcing anyone to wear a mask and we all had a lovely leisurely time. My kids and I dropped a significant amount of cash in their coffers. And we weren’t the only ones. The place was packed with both masked and non-masked customers, all respecting one another.”

Agnew says that after the way his family was treated and the clear disregard for the law on display he’ll never step foot in Strange Adventures and let all his mates in Leeds know about “the caveman like thinking that the primitive woke tribes in some parts of Canada still worship.”

“What an embarrassment stores like this one must be to an otherwise beautiful tourist destination that is having its first real crack at bringing in revenue after two years of off and on shutdowns, lock downs and other euphemisms for medical tyranny based on shaky science.”

“You know though, there is one good thing about this whole pandemic malarkey,” smiles Agnew philosophically “Now we all know who are the heroes and who are the villains, the masks are off.”